


Or Course I Lie

by orphan_account



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: Angst, Early Work, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-08
Updated: 2012-07-08
Packaged: 2017-11-09 10:45:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/454587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He doesn’t mind having to lie, as long as he can go home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Or Course I Lie

**Author's Note:**

> Very different to what I normally write, and quite old now.

And cut.

Sign this, pose here, smile.

Always smile. Never pout or look at me. Just smile.

His jaw hurt from smiling so much. He felt he must have the strongest cheek muscles in the industry with the amount he had to keep smiling, and his stupid brother, the smug bastard, could just stand there and look “hart”. Sometimes he wanted to take that cap off his head and shove it down his stupid smug throat. 

He started in this industry because he wanted to be recognised musically, he never lied when he said that music was his only option. He really couldn’t stand anything else, but this wasn’t his music, he wrote songs and lyrics and worked his fingers to the bone but he never knew what for, because every 99 times out of 100 the song would be rejected and the 1 song that wasn’t rejected was never good enough.

“Management thinks this verse sends the wrong image. Change it.”

He was never told what was wrong with it so he could improve, just that it needed to change.

He looked forward to every day when the cameras stopped rolling and he could stop pretending to be best buddies with his brother, the little wanker was pissing him off breathing at the moment. Management dictated every aspect of his life including ‘the twin thing’ “it’s cute play on it”. He didn’t get on his brother that well at all, as soon as he got off stage he got as far away from him as he could, being shoved together every day was not healthy. If they’d been normal siblings allowed to get away from each other then they might have gotten on most of the time, but by this time the bridge was already crumbling and had left in it’s wake a mutual deep seated hate for the other whenever they were together. They loved each other when they were apart, but that wasn’t very often.

It didn’t help that He had to act the child to his younger, yes younger, brother. Because apparently “if you’re older it doesn’t send the right image, you are effeminate you look like the younger more delicate person. We need someone to be protective of you so girls will be more interested.” So an hour older suddenly got changed to 10 minutes younger. “If we reduce the time difference between you two it will make the ‘twin bond ™’ seem stronger” He often wondered how many fans they’d loose if they realised the twins were no where near as close as the appeared to be on camera.

When he was told by management that they needed to band together and write a song about the strong bond between them he almost gagged. He tried. He honestly tried so hard to write a song for them. But nothing would come. In the end they had to bring in some songwriters to do it for them. In die nacht was the biggest lie in their concerts.

Of course that wasn’t the only thing in his life that was changed. In all of their lives, they each had something that wasn’t good enough about them, that needed to be different.

Tom wasn’t a playboy at all. Far from it he had only lost his virginity 6 months previously to a girl he’d been going out with for about a year. They’d split up recently because of the rigours of touring but they still kept in touch. Tom hadn’t brought himself to get another girlfriend yet. At least in that respect some truth was told when he said he was single.

Georg and Gustav were getting married. That one was a big problem, it wasn’t a shock to either of the twins, but if management caught wind of it they might find themselves with a new drummer and bassist. So far they’d managed to keep it very under wraps but they both knew that as soon as the documents were signed then they’d have a massive up-hill struggle to keep it from the media.

And Bill had to lie constantly. He had to be perpetually single and as straight as a ruler. When all he wanted to do was curl up on the sofa of the house (that he didn’t share with Tom) next to his wonderful caring boyfriend of 3 years. It was their anniversary today and he was stuck here. Writing autographs for bratty mini-bitches who would scratch another girl’s eyes out for a water bottle and screamed so loud that he had gone partially deaf in one ear, until he took a break to get his hearing straightened. 

After the lying there was the constant stress and strain of being on the road. The surgery on his vocal cords. Nothing scared him more than that did then. Tom was genuinely with him that whole time. Tom always thought his big brother was indestructible, and now here was proof that the big brother he looked up to so much was human. He had always assumed Bill could fight his way though anything, so when management refused him a break until it was too late, it made Tom worry not only for Bill but for himself.

Bill had a little method of getting through signings. He would tell himself that there were only ten more left to do, nine more left, eight more left, seven more left, until he got down to one and he could start again. It didn’t change his opinion much of the giggling hoards but at least it kept a smile on that pretty face of his.

Five more left, four more left, Three more left, two more left, one more left. 

Ten more left…

Until finally he was let back into the van and hidden from view. He could relax his face, relax his voice, relax his mind.

Saki announces they have a couple of days off, and as such where do they want to go?

Bill knows exactly where he wants to go.

“Home.”

An hour and a half later he pulls up to his moderately sized house just outside of Berlin and drags his suitcases inside.

“Jack. I’m home.” And there he is that boyish face and perfect smile. A smile that makes it impossible not to smile back even though Bill’s face hurts from smiling, however this time he means it.

A quick peck on the lips before Jack takes Bill’s hand and leads him into the kitchen

“Sit down, I’ll make you some peppermint tea and then you can tell me about your week.” As he watches his perfect lover move around the kitchen he can’t help but grin.  
Yes, this was by far the best anniversary present anyone could have given him. 

He’d have to thank Tom later. 

The smug git.


End file.
